Personal Diaries

I'm Renewing My Vows

Vows made in storms are forgotten in calm. ~ Thomas Fuller.


Writing this piece took quite a long time. For some minutes, I was simply staring at my laptop while trying to pick my words. I did went AWOL so many times in year 2017 because I could tell you, that year was one of the most traumatic years of my life. I couldn’t wait for the year to roll by. I lost a lot of myself, I questioned my mental health and most importantly, I dared myself to survive again. I can tell you it feels weird having to tell y’all a Happy New Year while the first month of the New Year is almost gone ‘cause I’d be pissed if someone wished me a happy birthday two days after the day (I just hate the word arrears/belated. . . advance is really cool though – my point is, I know the greeting sucks but I’m gonna say it anyway).
Yasss, A Happy New Year to you my amazing readers (I know it’s weird. . . but weird is my best right now). I just hope y’all understand. . . forgive my lateness. I couldn’t help it.
Alright. . .
before I stop talking about the old year (keeping not the former things), I would like to say that I made some life changing and ridiculous decisions before it ended. I walked away from an environment that stole my joy, made me question who I am in a very crushing manner; I quit my job, I got another job and then, I walked away from it again (even before starting). . . sounds ridiculous right? I know. . . It was so bad even till the first three weeks of January; I was depressed but I’m good now, looking at great.
Well, (I’m sure I’m gonna talk about all of those things as this blog launches its course this new year. . . I’m just gonna crave y’alls indulgence that you stick with me; it promises to be great, believe me!). I’m challenging myself a lot this new year to do so many things that scares me. . . so, that’s that.

For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him. ~ Philippians 2:13.

Y’all probably wondering; what’s up with I’m renewing my vows!
For starters, renewing vows (obviously marriage vows) isn’t really a Nigerian thing but we’ve had one or two celebrities in Nigeria renew their vows (e.g. Olu Jacobs and Joke Silva) but I for one had seen a lot of television characters renew their vows and when I did think about it, I realized renewing vows is very vital and helpful. It reminds the couple the whys, the spark, the need to be together, why each other, etc. ‘cause you know what, the pressure is real out there. It’s easy to get carried away and buried in a love of things that you begin to unconsciously care less and become not-so-dedicated like you used to. There’s work, children, your individual selves, family, friends, etc.
Renewing the vows helps stay committed and you know what I think, I think it should be done often – may be not always, but each time you mark an anniversary, that’s how you see silver jubilee together. And you know what also crossed my mind, it doesn’t have to be a large event; in fact, it doesn’t have to be public. Private is cool but none is outrageous.
So, how does that apply to me?
Well, sometimes, distractions don’t look like diversions; they look like what you really need! They look like opportunities that are rare; they look like platforms and avenues; they look like career and commitments; in fact, it can look like branding and you know what, you can begin to lose touch with what’s really yours! Where you started. . . and you know what, where you started from is always an integral part of your story; even if it’s sour, that’s what makes appreciating your sweet turn out very admirable.
So how do I fix that?
By going down the memory lane. Reminding myself why I started, how I started and the reason I needed to keep it, not abandon it and just walk away. For me, the it is my blog! Apart from the fact that I was a little depressed at the beginning of the year, I sort of told myself I wasn’t going to start blogging until I’ve branded and abandon my free domain for a paid for domain. You know what, the reason was so comfortable.
I’ve been blogging for some years now (not that long o) and leaving the free domain for a paid one is one branding step I should have taken by now and you know what, it wouldn’t really look so cool if I don’t when I had made the intention to do so known to y’all (me reasoning) but I had forgotten that people like Linda Ikeji spent years operating a free domain even though they had the money and I also forgot that I wasn’t really making money directly from this platform. So, why am I hard on myself??
Don’t get me wrong, branding is really cool! I’m branding. . . everyday, I challenge myself to do new kinds of writing thereby expanding my horizon, that’s branding. Daily making efforts to sell myself – that’s branding (get a business card, etc.), you know, it’s all part of it! Investing in yourself but what I’m saying is, sometimes we plan towards these things and the plans fail but you know what I think? Even if your plans fail, don’t let your interest fade. Keep it alive by reminding you why you started. I’m one of those people who think it’s possible making money from blogging but I’m still one of those people who wouldn’t stop blogging if I don’t make money from it because I didn’t launch out for that sake. I blog because I enjoy it. I blog because I want to share my stuff with the world and you know the beautiful thing about all of these is I get to inspire people! People get to enjoy my content. I’ve made quite a lot of contacts, I’ve sort of built a community. I’ve gotten opportunities showing my stuff here (that’s kinda making money to me – you may not get the ads, but you can get the highs?). I’ve got people telling me not to ever quit doing the stuff I do and the funniest thing is, all these timely words come whenever I’ve got so much on my plate that I don’t think I can be that committed again.
And you know what; I renewed my vows to my blog – my platform! To make it what it used to be and more! To walk away from jobs that would distract me from here ‘cause here is special.
Believe me, sometimes your plate might be full and nothing meaningful; nothing nourishing just a bunch of oils and starch (don’t get me wrong). Oil is good; starch is good! Sometimes that you have a full plate doesn’t mean you have a good meal. So you can just keep your beautiful plate busy with that one meal and keep working it out, staying hopeful and nourished.
Variety can be the spice of life but sometimes you don’t need spice if all it does is add smell! The question should be is it a good meal or just spicy?
In all, I’m just saying, it feels good to be back! And never forget, when your plans fail, keep your interest alive by reminding you why you do what you do; why you started a thing, how you kept the passion alive and why you should start it again.
I hope y’all have gotten used to my epistles by now and lest I forget, I want to say a very big thank you to Me and These Curls. I got a notification about being mentioned in a nomination. I visited the link and it happened that my blog was her favourite. She said really nice things about my blog and I didn’t think someone would feel that much about my platform. Thank you Queen!? you’re the reason walking away was no longer a thought!??
Y’all should go read that post here and follow her! She does amazing posts on natural hair, beauty and more?.
Do enjoy the rest of the week!!! and I’m looking forward to your comments. . . kisses??
ff on IG -@ibukunwrites_hub @ibukunwrites
ff on Twitter -@ibukunwrites
. ~ ©2018. Ibukunwrites

Pressures are real but what’s most real is a heart that’s willing to defy the odds and make it work. ~ Ibukunwrites. 2018

Feminist with unconventional thoughts . . . an everything art, literature, daily living and lifestyle world with enough faith toppings. Sometimes, the toppings are everything. Here, you give in to your cravings, get satisfied, crave anew and stay addicted.

4 Comments

  • Gavin Longy

    Happy new year to you Ebukun. It doesn’t seem that long ago I was reading one of your blogs. I enjoyed reading this honest piece about renewal. A great theme for this time of year, lots of time to plan what you want to achieve this year. Do what makes you happy and have fun. I’m intrigued to see what the next blog will be. I enjoyed the book reviews, love food recipes, always talking about how to get more women in leadership positions with my friends. On my list this year is to read more Chinua Achebe and have fun. Everyone goes awol sometimes, we all need to renew our drive and set new goals. Keep blogging

    • Ebukun Gbemisola Ogunyemi

      Awwww thanks a lot Gavin!!! I wish I could say more but the few words summarizes my appreciation! It’s great knowing you enjoy talking about getting more women in leadership positions. Would hopefully bring many book reviews/recipes your way this new year. . . And I’m loving your goals for the new year! ❤

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