Let's talk about it/Keeping It Real

ON BODY SHAMING: NIGERIAN WOMEN NEED TO DO BETTER

Pheeew! It’s been a while. Well, it feels good to have gathered enough momentum to be back here.

Often times when we speak of body shaming and how ridiculously shameful it is to engage in the act, we don’t speak of how endangering it can be to building and raising a community of true women supporting and standing up for one another because for me, I don’t think body shaming in itself is the saddest part, I think the fact that women are mostly the perpetrators of this act makes it the saddest.

I don’t think body shaming in itself is the saddest part, I think the fact that women are mostly the perpetrators of this act makes it the saddest. Click To Tweet

A lot of times, women come for one another’s bodies for silly reasons like trying to feel better about themselves, ridiculously trying to be petty, trying to bring the other woman down for no reason, thereby watering their self-esteem, showoff too, sometimes and other ridiculous excuses.

Last week, one of the most controversial media personnel, Kemi Olulonyo stated a ridiculous fact that sadly everyone seemed to agree to that “women in Nigeria aren’t bound to support one another or stick together, they are bound to tear one another part or bring each other down.” Well probably that’s not how she said it but that’s the summary of the quote and as much as I would love to disagree, a high number of people sadly concurring says a lot about the reality of women love, respect and admiration in Nigeria.

 

Many months back, popular OAP, Toke Makinwa shared her struggle with fibroids and how it really made her look bloated and all and all. Well, the essence of referring to this story is not to analyze the story or other events that happened after that revelation but it is to actually examine the reaction of people after she made the revelation. A lot of people were like chai, and I used to insult her all those times when she would dress and host events and parties and all, not knowing she was going through this. You know that’s why it’s not good to body-shame people because you don’t know what they are going through.”

It’s really sad how we get used to things that are condescending in the bid to stomach and understand the foolery behind the utterances. Click To Tweet

As much as those words might have projected a kind of sobriety, I think it says a lot about who we are; that we cannot be compassionate, be kind with and in our words unless we know the story.

Sometimes, I’ve heard a lot of people come for my body, my boobs, my legs, etc. and no, it really doesn’t get to me, that’s the truth because somehow, I’ve managed to get used to it you know. It’s really sad how we get used to things that are condescending in the bid to stomach and understand the foolery behind the utterances.

The truth is, people go through so much struggling with that part of their body you shame and when they don’t, that part of the body might have probably gone through a lot or withstood a lot. And I also think that the worst kind of body shaming ever are the ones that tend to sound like jokes, comedy and seem funny to people.

All these ridiculous comics about how a fellow woman looks like pencil, overripe plantain, yam legs, fat arms, amoeba-ic shape, lime breast are so annoying. Sometimes, I’m forced to ask the questions, to what end? What kind of sour comedy is that? 

The truth is, people go through so much struggling with that part of their body you shame and when they don’t, that part of the body might have probably gone through a lot or withstood a lot. Click To Tweet

I’m just saying, as Nigerian women, we need to do better. Don’t wait to know the story to do better! Be kind. It doesn’t cost a thing. 

Have a wonderful week! It feels good creating time to be here.

Much love! ❤️

4 thoughts on “ON BODY SHAMING: NIGERIAN WOMEN NEED TO DO BETTER”

  1. So much truth you are speaking, Ibukun. I love the part that ‘we cannot be compassionate, be kind with and in our words unless we know the story’ which is a terrible way of life.

    We really need to do better and be more empathetic towards people. Sometimes, i get to wonder whether it is really important to speak so terrible about people at all. If we do not, we would still live. So why not live and let others live too without being so condescending.

    http://www.debwritesblog.com

  2. Debs! Thanks a lot for the words 🙌 you’ve said it all in the last part of your comment. “We really need to do Better and be more empathetic. . .” we all can live without being condescending of one another. Everyday, to me sha ó, life just becomes too vain and kinda meaningless. I mean, why do we have to be mean to another person on this planet earth? I mean, it’s just this planet right? What else is there to see. . . Thanks for the comment once again! ❤️

  3. I am always awed each time I get to read you.. ( I mean your write up).

    It’s not just the women that do the body shaming thingy… Even the men do it.. We really need to do better and show a bit of love, kindness and heart to our fellow humans..

    I feel when you body shame, you indirectly insult God the Creator. I wish people will have this mentality and do better.

    Once again it’s a such a pleasure reading you.. 🍻Cheers

    1. Awwww Uche! Thanks a lot for your comment. It’s always great reading your comments too. I hope I post often to get to read them more. Sorry for the late reply and yea, you’re very right, men body-shame too! I should write about it too soon. Thank you!

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